


Being me

by oreo_vampire



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alpha Kageyama Tobio, Alpha Sawamura Daichi, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Angst, Fluff, Graduation, M/M, Omega Hinata Shouyou, Omega Sugawara Koushi, Omega Verse, Rare Pair, School, Secret Admirer, Secret Crush, Self-Acceptance, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Lubrication, Slow Burn, Suga has a crush on Hinata, i see you more as a friend, kageyama is a sweetheart, strong Koushi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2017-04-28
Packaged: 2018-09-22 18:25:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9619733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oreo_vampire/pseuds/oreo_vampire
Summary: Suga lived without doubt of himself being a Beta. But recently his body feels strange…and then there is this pair of dark, capitivating eyes, seeming to follow him everywhere he goes.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic, haven fun!

A ball of red hair was bouncing up and down, causing it's viewer a light feeling of uneasiness at the incredibly fast motion.

“You are not an omega?!”

Mouth wide open, Hinata stared at Suga with disbelief. _No, I am not and I am totally fine with that._

“Sheeshh, Hinata. Would you consider your sound level, please?” Holding his hands protective over his ears, Suga tried to dim the suprisingly noisy sounds coming out of the smaller male.

“I totally would have bet that you are one. Cause your so, so dun! and bdan! I thought you were taking suppressants and that is why you don’t smell. “

“I am sorry to disappoint you there Hinata,” said Suga, showing a soothing smile to his smaller red-haired kouhai.

“Well, you don´t know for sure,” Daichi added, having followed the conversation along. “You haven´t presented yet.”

“I am almost eighteen Daichi, I am pretty sure that I am a beta.”

“Daichi-san would you court Suga-san if he would turn out to be an omega?”

“Haven´t thought about that to be honest. But…,” Daichi´s eyes checked Suga´s figure critically from head to toe. After a thoughtful, excessively long pause he responded, “I would not mind to gi-ughhh!” The Karasuno captain was not able to finish his sentence. He was being cut off air by a punch from his best friend, making his knees buckle down. Ignoring the painfilled sounds coming from Daichi, Suga ruffled through Hinata´s hair grinning while Daichi was desperately trying to get his lungs back working again.

“We should not waste our precious training time, right Hinata? How about I practice with you some tosses?“ Hinata´s eyes immediately began sparkling.

“Yay, tosses, tosses! Suga-senpai you´re the best!”

“I am, right? Don´t forget to mention that to everyone when you´re getting famous.”

 _So easy to please_ , Suga smiled to himself, watching Hinata, who seemed to never run out of energy, sprinting to the end of the gym to get a volleyball.

The so called second gender consisting of alpha, beta and omega, was the gender which determined the life you would be living. You yourself, your character, achievements, talents and actions were being measured according to it. Alphas were considered to be more talented and capable than betas or omegas. They are, so to say, the ones who rule the world. The ones dominating the other genders. Sometimes Suga catches himself being jealous of the alphas, who seem to get everything they want effortlessly.

Alphas and omegas are able to mate, meaning they are able to form a special emotional bond with the intention to reproduce, which is the only value omegas seem to have in the society, since they lack talent and skills in all kinds of ways. It didn't matter if your were male or female, if your second gender turns out to be an omega, your body was able to give birth. Childbearer of alphas, that's what they were. And the betas, well, they are the faceless creatures trying to live their life as peaceful as possible.

Suga would never admit it in public but he was grateful that he was not part of this vicious Alpha/Omega cycle. He never would want to do dominate others but just as little did he not want to bow to anyone.

He had heard a lot of stories about injustices committed against omegas. Being valued less because of your gender you accidentally were born with was just not fair. His insides were burning with sheer fury every time he read or saw some news about it. There is more about the human being than just his gender. _We are made of much more, why won´t the people see it_? Alphas with good grades were considered geniuses while Omegas in contrast to that seemed to have pure luck reaching high scores. Maybe someday the people will shake the veil of ignorance off and start to be reasonable.

Suga was really proud of the omegan players in the Karasuno team. They had the same worth and right to be on the court as the alpha payers. With the current team they may even be able to climb the latter to the nationals. Full of pleasant anticipation Suga continued to practice his setting skills. _I can´t slack off otherwise all the others will be ahead of me_ , he was constantly reminding himself.

“Okay guys, class is about to start soon. Let´s clean up,” Daichi voice filled the gym.

“Hey Suga, did you already took a shower?” Asahi was standing beside him trying to fold down the net neatly.

“Huh?”

“You´re dripping all over the floor.”

“I am sweating. We had practice not a minute ago. You forgot? ”

“I am sorry,” halting in but nevertheless Asahi continued, “but what did you do to lose this amount of sweat? You should sit down and rest.”

_He is not looking down on me, is he? I mean, it's Asahi._

“You know, I worked on a new method to overcome negativity. Want to see it?”

Asahi´s face turned pale within seconds and he quickly turned around, grabbing the net making his way to Nishinoya, pretending to have heard him asking for his help.

Well, Asahi was right. Suga´s gym clothes were soaked in his sweat. It looked like he had sauna. Back in the locker he was being offered a towel by Kageyama. Suga grabbed the towel he was given by his upperclassmen, muttering his thanks to him.

“Are you okay?”

 _Was he OKAY? Why was his lack of stamina after practice a reason to pick on him?_   He knew that he wasn´t as athletic as Asahi or Kageyama but beta and alpha skills were just not comparable. He glared at Kageyama annoyed, trying to keep his mouth from saying something he would regret. It's not very mature to let your anger out on other people.

“I don´t know you seem different today,” Kageyama said apologetically, putting his shoes inside his locker.

“I am fine Kageyama,” Suga says gesturing with his hand to his kouhai that everything was alright.

 

 

 

In class Suga failed to concentrate. The words the teachers spoke were drowned by his heartbeat and the blood rushing through his veins. Everything around him seemed to get dull as if he was under water. Daichi gave Suga a worried look, when the former mentioned excused himself from class to go to the toilet. _Something is not right. My whole body is burning up._ He leaned at the wall to calm his breath and to cool down his skin. Maybe he should go home. Is he getting ill?

“Sugawara-senpai?”

He wasn´t able to turn around. He needed his strength to hold his body up against the wall.

“You need to go to the infirmary.”

“Why are you not… in your class….?”

Suga closed his eyes. Even talking was too much of a task to do. He felt an arm grabbing him around the shoulder. Closing his eyes he drifted to sleep.

 

 

When he woke up he was at the infirmary, lying on one of the beds. He stood up, trying to figure out what he was doing here.

“Everything is fine Sugawara-kun. Just lay down for a few more minutes. You lost your consciousness.” Hands were pressed gently on his shoulders, trying to make him lay down again.

“You were dehydrated. You should now, that you always have to drink enough liquid to keep your system working. Now that you are awake, you should go home as soon as possible.” Suga felt better than before but his body still felt a bit sluggish.

“What is wrong with me? Do I have a cold?”

“A cold? Oh boy, certainly not. You are a funny one are you?” She had a faint smile on her lips. Suga did not smile back. _What was so funny?_ Mustering Suga as if she saw him for the first time, her expression changed from amusement to worry. Her eyes widened as if something just felt into place.

“Could it be? It seems like this is your first,” she said murmuring to herself.

“My first what?” Suga was not feeling very comfortable being looked at like a rare animal.

“You´re in pre-heat.”

He looked back at the nurse trying to comprehend what she just stated to him. He thought his hearing had gone bad.

“I am sorry did you say pre-heat? Like an omega would have?”

“Not just like an Omega would have. Exactly as an omega would have.”


	2. Chapter 2

“I am not an omega,” Suga forced a smile while trying to get out of the bed.

“I only judge according to the things I see and what I see is a male omega entering his first heat.” She walked to her desk, opening the top drawer.

“There is no need to worry. Everything just proceeds as it normally would. I don´t believe you are prepared for what will about to be happen. Or are you?” In her hands was a blue colored box. She wanted him to take it. Suga turned his eyes away in disgust.

“What is this?” Of course he knew what this long shaped thing inside the box was, but he just couldn´t believe that she just got it out of the drawer and wanted him to use this.

_God, no._

“I don´t need this kind of thing,” he said grumbling with eyes fixed on the ground.

“I know this must be hard for you at your age to be confronted with something like this but believe me you will need it. Especially when you spend your heat alone. Or do you have an alpha who will take care of your needs? “

 _That´s it._ Has everyone lost their reason except for him? Forgetting his fatigue Suga climbed out of the bed making his way to the door.

“Thank you for taking care of me Sensei but I am feeling much better now and I will be going back to class. And just to answer your question: I _do not_ and I _will not_ ever need an alpha taking care of me because I am not an omega. “ He rattled at the door, but it didn't open. _What the hell?_

“I locked the door. Just a precaution.”

“You cannot do this Sensei. Please open the door.”

Her eyes were fixating him and she spoke in a more severe tone than before making it clear that he was in no position to demand anything.

“Stop acting like a little child. This is serious Sugawara-kun. I need to have this conversation with you. I don’t want you to be overwhelmed by all this new feelings you will be experiencing. When you know, what you will have to go through it will lessen the fear and the pain.”

Suga knew when there was no use to talk back and sat down reluctantly on one of the chairs with his arms folded and brows furrowed. They talked, or to be more correct, the nurse babbled for almost half an hour about "the Omega and his needs".

“Do you have any questions left Sugawara-kun?” She finally said.

Suga shook his head. His body started to feel hot again. Seeing his condition, she pulled a mobile phone out of her pocket.

“I already gave you a light dose of suppressants for you to get home without the occurring of the symptoms, but it seems like you will be entering your heat soon. Can one of your parents come to school pick you up?”

“I would rather not call them off from work because of something like that. They will worry sick.”

“You are a thoughtful child Sugawara-kun but I won´t let you go home alone. Someone has to accompany you and I can´t leave the office. I am sure your parents will understand.”

“Kageyama can take me home.” Looking at the door Suga wondered why he even said what he just said. He just knew that he didn´t want to talk to his parents right know.

“Who?”

“He is the one who brought me here. He is standing behind the door. I can smell..” Wait he could what? He could smell him. Suga knew the meaning of the words he uttered but still he refused to accept the changes happening in his body.

She mustered Suga for a few seconds and then made her way to door. After a silent conversation with the boy on the other side of the door, she sent the two boys off.

 

 

“You really don´t have to accompany me home Kageyama. I don´t need you to escort me. I am a guy and can take care of myself. It´s probably just a summer cold.”

“You do not have to lie to me Sugawara-senpai.” Kageyama did not sound angry or reproachful saying those words. If at all, he sounded upset.

“I know that I am not as intelligent as you are, but even I can see what is going on. You are acting irresponsible.” Kageyama glared at him, eyes slightly furrowed and his mouth slightly open as if he wanted to add something more to the conversation but decided against it. _Straightforward as always are you not Kageyama, huh?_

 _Great_ , now he was even being lectured by his kouhai. And the worst thing was that everyone was right and Suga was the one messing things up. Suga could not find any words to respond to Kageyama, so he just remained silent and kept walking. Suga was glad that Kageyama was the one accompanying him home because he wouldn´t start any unnecessary conversation and Suga was not in the mood for talking. Also being with him seemed to calm him down. Wait, calm him down? Something was definitely wrong with him he had to admit that. _Why is such a simple task as walking getting harder and harder to do?_ Suga almost kissed the ground if Kageyama hadn´t grabbed his shoulders. Finally they arrived at Suga's house.

“Thanks for bringing me home Kageyama. I am sorry to have caused you trouble.” Suga made a slightly bow and with a swift movement, slipped the key into the front door. Before locking the door behind him he said, his voice almost a whisper, “Could you not tell anyone yet, please? I need some time to comprehend all this.” Suga wasn´t able to look Kageyama in the eyes while he uttered his plea.

 

 

It almost took a week before his heat finished. For the whole time he had locked himself into his room and refused to come out. He did not want to go to school. He did not want to face his classmates and his team. _I cannot do this. Why, why, why_. He was muttering the words again and again  like a mantra that was never being answered.

He tried to calm down. Nothing changed. Nothing changed, expect for the pills and suppressants making him dizzy, nauseous and giving him headaches. Everything was the same, expect the looks of the people eyeing him from head to toe sometimes with disgust sometimes with amusement. Absolutely nothing changed, expect for the estrus he has to go through twelve times a year.

 

Suga was looking at the gym door, his hands freezed in midair before the doorknob. _I am still me even if I am an omega now._ Sighing, he pushed the handle down and went in.

“Suga-san!” Hinata was the first one noticing him entering the gym. It seems like Kageyama hadn´t say a word to anyone. He was grateful for that.

“You´re back! We were so worried. You were gone for a whole week and….?”

“I am really sorry to have made you all worry. Eh? What´s wrong Hinata?”

In that moment he was being hugged really hard by the tiny body of his kouhai.

“I knew it”, Hinata said snuggling into Suga´s chest. “Are you okay Suga-san?”

He looked into Hinata´s eyes which were normally sparkling like stars, full of admiration and childish curiosity but now giving him a worried look. _That look doesn´t fit you Hinata_ , _you should be not looking like that because of me_. _Breathe slowly Suga, everything is fine._ He hugged Hinata back. It felt good. Really good. He read once about the omegas ability to calm someone down. Their smell could be comforting, soothing. Suga inhaled Hinatas scent and his nervousness faded away.

“I am absolutely fine”, Suga assured him with one of his radiant smiles, _thanks to you Hinata_ , he thought.


	3. Chapter 3

There were three months left until the summer Inter-high Tournament. Karasuno was going to show everyone that the fallen champions or the clipped-winged crows, how they were called, would be able to fly high again.

”Hinata, how about getting some food after practice? It is my treat.”

More than delighted Hinata said yes and they decided for a ramen shop that was about a ten minute walk from school.

“Hmm, let´s see.” Studying the pictures on the wall, Suga decided to go for a spicy ramen with tofu.

“Sorry, we are out of spicy ramen.” The cashier replied bored.

“Oh, really? That is too bad. Then the hakata ramen please.”

“Do not have that either.”

“Then which ones are available?” Hinata was tugging on Suga´s left sleeve, leading his attention away from his current conversation.

“Suga-san, I think we should just go somewhere else.” He said with a small voice.

“What are you saying Hinata? I think the food in here looks quite good.“

“I am not hungry anymore. Let's just go.” Why was Hinata getting so worked up for? The young boy had been really delighted stating, he would eat three bowls of ramen on their way to the shop. He looked at Hinata. Something was off. Then Suga noticed it. The smell. He could smell distress coming from Hinata.

“Hey, what is wrong? Are you not feeling well?” He grabbed Hinata´s hand.

“Hey omega, you are blocking the line.”

Suga slowly got used to his new ability to smell the different tensions in people's behavior. He hadn't noticed until now that there was something like a heavy cloud forming above them. Hinata must have felt it long before Suga, that the people here did not want to have omegas eating in their shop. But maybe it was just his imagination. Pulling Hinata closer to him, he asked the cashier again with a bright smile which of the ramen was available. The cashier did not want to speak it out loud, but seeing that his unfriendliness did not lead to the anticipated behavior of the omega, he did not even try to hide his hostility.

“We have no ramen for omegas. Better you get out of here before something bad will happen.”

He could feel Hinata's shaking hands and embarrassed, they made their way out of the shop. “I bet their ramen tastes like crap. How about going there?” Suga smiled at Hinata pointing to a restaurant at the corner of the street.

“I-, I think I just want to go home.”

This was the worst. He just wanted to have a good time with Hinata and out of all the food shops here, he had chosen one, which was prejudiced against omegas. _I am so stupid_. _I should have seen this coming sooner_. Still cursing himself mentally, a question popped up his mind.

“Hinata.” Hinata looked up to him. “Be honest. How often does this kind of thing happen?”

Hinata was nervously fidgeting, thinking about if he should answer honestly. “It is not that common,” he began “when I am with you guys it never happens. Only sometimes when I am alone.”

“I didn't know that. Why didn´t you tell anyone?”

“And then what?” Hinata hissed slightly aggressive. That straightforward question surprised Suga. He was not able to hold eye contact for long and started to feel miserable and helpless.

“I don´t know,” was the only thing he managed to answer.

 

 

 

It was the first day of the tournament and Suga could feel that the anticipation from the other players was making him excited. Their first rival would be the Tokonami High School and even if he was on the bench for this first match, he wanted to give his best by cheering on his teammates. Since it is the first year of him being in heat, it could kick in on an irregular basis and being surrounded by so many alpha players could reinforce the probability of a heat. Suga could feel a slight tinlging in his stomach. Thinking that it may be better to take another suppressant without anyone seeing, he made his way to the restroom. _I have to hurry up. The match will start soon_.

 

“You do smell nice.” Ignoring the voice Suga made his way out of the toilet. Or at least he wanted to, but an arm blocked his way.

“Could you please clear the way? My match is going to start soon.” Suga tried to act as politely as he could. He has gotten quite good at reading the mood and he could tell this conversation was going to be exhausting. The guy in front of Suga was at least one head taller than him with a strong built, which he used to intimidate the omega. He was able to draw Suga away from the exit into a corner of the restroom.

“Won't you rather have fun with me? I mean isn't this the only thing you want?” Seeing the contempt in the eyes of his opponent, Suga was being reminded clearly that there is still this outdated way of thinking in the mind of modern and supposedly well-educated people regarding this second gender. While thinking of a way to do a run without provoking the alpha, he could feel a hand touching places on his body, he would rather not mention. Being touched by a stranger inappropriately like that made Suga's resolution to be polite crumble away.

Disgust clearly resonating in his voice he said “My teammates need me so could you please…?” He tried to push the Alpha away who just started to chuckle.

“You are an omega. They do not need you.“ Suga glared daggers at him.

“Wait, are you seriously playing in the game?” Suga was just sitting on the bench, but this was something the other party did not need to know.

“What a bunch of idiots letting you play. You should do something you really can like producing offspring. Why not starting directly?” He could made out the devious smile of the alpha, while whispering those words into Suga's ear. He trailed Sugas neck with his tongue. Suga went stiff as he felt a warm breathing at his scent glad.

“Relax. I have no interest in bonding with you omega.” _So he was purely satisfying his instincts like an animal?_ Overcoming the first shock from being treated like an object and not as an human being, Suga punched the alpha in the side. The alpha let out a growl, but found his compusture back quickly. He seemed amused by Sugas useless attempt to get away from him.

“Not bad, but not enough to stop me.” He stated in a sweet voice.

Panicking, Suga tried again to land again a punch into the alpha's stomach but his movement was stopped almost effortlessly by his attacker. Both his arms were being grabbed and folded above his head.

“You are playing hard to get, huh?” Eyes furrowed, Suga looked at him with a mixture of revulsion and hatred. Seeing this reaction made his attacker smile, riling him more up.

“Oho, this is going to be fun,” he licked his lips “Don´t struggle so much or I have to hurt you.”

“I don't want this! Stop!” screaming as loud as he could, hoping someone would hear him, Suga tried his best to get his hands free.

“Hmmpf!”

“Can't have you screaming here, can I?”

Suga's body was paralyzed by the strong pheromones the Alpha was releasing. _Help._ His body did not feel like his anymore. _Help me._ He failed to even to lift a finger. Shutting his eyes, the only thing he seemed able to do, he wished himself far away. _Don´t think. Don’t think anything_.

Suddenly the weight from him was gone, the only thing that had kept him standing. Knees giving in, he sunk onto the floor, eyes still closed. Hugging his knees, he started wailing like a little child. He could make out voices. They were rather aggressive, getting louder and louder but he did not quite understand their meaning. Then silence. Someone was crouching before him putting a hand on his shoulder.

“It's okay. It's okay now.” It was a familiar voice. Calm and strong, comforting. “He is gone.” Suga´s whole body was shaking.

“Don´t touch me.” It was merely a whisper, the only thing he managed to say with his hoarse voice, but the person seemed to have understood since he could feel the pressure on his shoulder leave.

“Suga-san, can you hear me? Are you alright? Should I call someone?”

“M´fine.” _I am not fine_. Suga tried to stand up but failed miserably. Having someone seen his encounter with the alpha made the situation much more humiliating.

“The match is beginning soon.” _Right the match, pull yourself together Koushi._

“You should wash your face or the others will notice that something is wrong.” Lifting his finger to his face, Suga could feel traces of wetness. He must have cried.

_God, I am not feeling like myself anymore. I feel so useless._

 

Karasuno High won the match against Tokonami in two sets. Thanks to Hinata being the greatest decoy and Kageyama´s great setter skills, Karasuno has risen again. Data Technical High School, a team that can be summed up as Iron Wall because of their defense power, was going to be their next opponent. Three months ago, it was this team which crushed Karasuno, letting no ball hit by Asahi go through. If Suga would have been a better setter, having instincts and athletic skills like Kageyama or if he had been more demanding, then maybe, maybe they might have won the match. But he wasn't an alpha and he never would be.

Practice went well, everyone was still spurred because of their first victory in the tournament but Koushi was tense, typing his index finger on the volleyball in his hand, lost in thought.

“Koushi get the water bottles ready, will you?”

“You think you can command me because I'm an omega? Go get them yourself.” All eyes were set on Daichi, who tried to defuse the situation kidding around.

“Allright, I get them. Don´t fight in front of the kids, my love.” Ignoring Daichi, Suga focused on his own practice.

 

And so the days passed by. Long after everyone was gone, even after the chaotic duo, consisting of Hinata and Kageyama, was kicked out by coach Ukai, Suga was still standing on the court.

“Koushi, it's late, let's go home.” Suga's serve missed the bottle standing on the left back of the court.

_Damn it. Missed again._

“What are you trying to prove?” He could see the concerned look on the face of his friend.

_Mind your own business Daichi._

“That you are still worth something even when you are an omega? We know that Koushi, nothing changed, you are still you. Why are you getting so worked up about this whole omega thing?” Suga stopped his practice, turning his face to Daichi.

“Why? Are you honestly asking why? Then try becoming an omega and then we talk again.” Suga let out an angry snort.

“You are being lately really moody you know that? “

Something cracked in his mind, hearing those words.

“Oh, I am MOODY, yeah?”

“Koushi, come on. Calm down. This is starting getting ridiculous.”

“I AM COMPLETY CALM DAICHI, CAN´T YOU SEE THAT?!”

A ball passed Daichi by, almost brushing his face.

“Koushi! I am sorry, please.” He was trying to protect his face from further attacks.

“Now you are sorry? You know why am all MOODY? Because of this stupid hormones. I am overflowing with them. Feeling all these, all these _things_. It is like playing emotional pinball, never knowing where it hits next. Being _overemotional_ , yeah right, it´s ridiculous. I know it´s stupid but I _cannot_ do anything about it. And you say, I should just CALM DOWN?! You have no right to judge me, you're an alpha!” Daichi's eyes furrowed at the comment.

“You're drowning in your self-pity Suga. You think, you have it all figured out, right? Making alphas the bad guys. Isn't that a little bit too easy, to use this kind of limited world view? Ah no, I forgot you´re an omega, you can't know better.“

Suga could felt his head turning red. He was ashamed. This is the first time Daichi ever spoke like that to him. This was even the first time they were having such a heated argument. He felt like a little child getting scolded by his parents. Clenching his hands into fists, his knuckles turned white. Biting his lip, he could only remain silent in the presence of the alpha.

“You’re also thinking like everyone else does Suga, but you are too stubborn to admit it. Do you think I wanted to be born as an alpha? I was not asked. I would have never thought that you were also like everyone else. Do you think I have never noticed how your look towards me changed, when I presented as an alpha? It really hurt me and now I am fed up with it. Do you want to get a reason to loathe alphas or to pity you even more? I can give you that.”

“Daichi I-“

“ _Shut your mouth_ who said you could speak?”

A chill run down his spine making his mind go blank and his body freeze. This wasn't the Daichi he knew. Daichi's gigantic figure was above him, his shadow lying over him, just waiting to eat him whole. His fear manifested itself in his whole body shaking. Daichi was mad or rather the alpha he is, was. This is the power of an alpha´s voice: being able to turn an omega within seconds into a stuttering, useless mess.

“You said you didn't want things to get changed but you're the one who changed everything. You are reducing yourself to those categories. Why not acting like that?”

“On your knees”, he hissed.


	4. Chapter 4

Suga tried to fight his urge to submit subconsciously to Daichi´s alpha demands but failed miserably to do so. He went down on his knees almost immediately when Daichi told him to. A short glimpse to the Karasuno captain revealed a smug smile on his face.

 

_Was Daichi enjoying this? What was that thing with alphas always having to show off their superiority towards non alphas? Power-mad bastards, all of them._

 

“I´m thinking,” Daichi said, tipping with his index finger lightly on his chin as in deep thought “if not words but actions will provide you finally with some understanding.” Suga squeezed his eyes into two narrow slits, clearly disliking the silky voice his friend was using.

 

“Oh, I know, you are going to be my mate.” Suga swallowed hard. _He is kidding, right? There is no way he…_ “This is not a question, of course. I am an alpha and I get everything I want or what is your opinion on that Koushi?” Suga wanted to insult him and shout at him all kinds of names but thanks to Daichi’s threatening alpha aura his voice failed to come out. "I see, no complaints? How nice," he purred.

 

Daichi was now leaning down, his fierce gaze continuing to paralyze Suga. He reached out for Suga's face almost touching it, when the sound of another voice was stopping him from going any further.

 

“Sugawara-senpai is everything alright?”

 

There was a long awkward silence. The only thing one could hear was Suga´s heart, pounding against his ribcage as if it wanted to break itself free from his body.

 

 _Shit, shit, stop shaking you stupid omega body_.

 

“Kageyama, what are you still doing here?” Daichi was the first one to speak up.

 

“I forgot my wallet.”

 

“Did you find it?” He nodded. “Then go home.” Kageyama seemed unsure, if he should obey Daichi or not and that didn't slip Daichi's attention.

 

“We are having a conversation right now. Please leave.”

 

“I am not leaving until Sugawara-senpai says so.” This was not the answer Daichi wanted to hear, Suga could tell.

 

“As your captain, I say that I want to have a discussion with my vice-captain in private. Please leave Kageyama. _Now_. “

 

Daichi said those words without even paying really attention to the younger setter. His gaze was concentrated on Suga, his prey, to describe it in animal-like mentality. Kageyama eyes were also firmly fixed on Suga, who was still down on his knees. The appearance of a second alpha only added to Koushi being stressed out to the point, he forgot how to even stand up properly.

 

“I am not leaving.”

 

Suga could hear a grumble coming out of Daichi´s mouth. This was bad. Suga never had seen Daichi getting this mad. He was almost turning feral. The one good thing of this encounter was that, thanks to Kageyama, Daichi was getting distracted and with his focus leaving him, Suga could feel the pressure on his body go away.

 

“Maybe we should all keep a cool head and go home to get some rest. I am sure you can also talk tomorrow Sawamura-senpai.”

 

“Kageyama do I really need to kick you out personally?” Daichi was closing the distance between him and Kageyama within seconds. Kageyama didn´t seem to care about his captain’s aggressiveness, unimpressed, he didn’t budge an inch.

 

“Come on now.” Daichi grabbed Kageyama by the shoulders but the moment he started to drag him out, his hands were harshly being brushed away by his kouhai with such a force it took him by surprise. Not as much as Kageyama’s words afterwards. He was practically shouting.

 

“You´re frightening the hell out of Suga-san! Can't you smell it?! How can you reason with him like that?”

 

Kageyama´s reproving words triggered something inside Daichi and startled, he looked down to the ground as if he finally had snapped out of a state of trance. He was back to his usual self. When he turned around to his best friend to apologize for his utterly stupid behavior he saw that he was already gone.

 

 

 

 

Suga didn´t feel too well. He wasn´t sure if he would ever experience a condition other than being miserable ever again. He had left the gym without his sports bag, running home thinly dressed. When he finally arrived, he was chilled to the bones. Of course his parents asked him if something has happened but he simply answered that he had forgotten the time while he was trying out a new training program involving a lot of running.

 

He took a long warm bath, just wanting the day to be over already. Leaving the bath, feeling refreshed and warmed up, he almost stumbled over the sports bag, he definitely had left at school.

 

“One of your teammates brought it here while you were bathing. Seriously Koushi, are you sure you´re feeling well? How could you forget your bag? You should thank your teammate properly for bringing it all the way here.”

 

He was letting himself fall down diagonally his bed, with his brows furrowed and arms folded, his typical posture when thinking. Only after Daichi had scolded him, forced him to listen, did he understand how much he must have hurt his friend with his hostile behavior all this time. He cringed at the thought of how he had looked down on alphas, even omegas sometimes, just seeing their weaknesses, their flaws and shortcomings. He never tried to understand what being an alpha or omega meant and he never would have tried to if he hadn’t been classified as an omega. Alphas could never have developed a good image of themselves because Suga wouldn’t let them change his opinion of them.

 

He gritted his teeth, a bad habit he tried to get rid of, when he was being angry. Damn was he mad. The alphas were always the ones he could project his anger onto. Being angry was easy, uncomplicated. He clenched his hands into fists, hearing his joints creaking at the move. Saying that alphas were better at sports was easier than training harder to get better. Blaming Daichi for being an alpha was much easier than self-exploration. Loathing society for not changing the way omegas are seen was easier than doing something on your own to change the situation. Ignoring all these uncomfortable feelings, the disappointment, the guilt, the fear, the sorrow, was easier than to cope with them. Suga covered his face with his hands, taking a deep breath in and out. Not ten minutes later he felt asleep.

 

 

“Koushi can we talk?” Closing his eyes, Suga slowly turned around, meeting Daichi’s eyes. When Daichi was getting closer to him his body stiffened distinctly. He wasn’t able to hold eye contact for long, admiring the pattern floor. He was still vexed at him.

 

“Why do you even bother asking, command me to. I know you can.” He didn’t need to look up to see his friend’s distorted face. His words hurt him, he knew, but he deserved it.

 

“You have all the right to be mad at me but…”

 

“But since I am an omega I should just suck it up and go on with my life?”

 

“No! I’m sorry Koushi, I didn’t mean to drive you into a corner yesterday. I don’t know, I just got really angry and..” Suga was holding up a hand, gesturing him to stop talking.

 

“It’s okay Daichi.” He tried to look relaxed but he was sure Daichi could smell his uncomfortableness. “I understand what you were trying to tell me, I got your point, congratulations, but your way of getting your message trough was definitely not right.”

 

“Koushi, I…”

 

“Do you know that Hinata and I got harassed by a couple of alphas a while ago? That I almost got raped in the restroom on last week’s tournament because I am on omega? Do you know how it feels like to be looked at like you aren’t a human anymore, as if you are a worthless piece of trash only because your second gender turned out to be neither alpha nor beta?” Daichi was silently absorbing all these new information from his friend, sadness carved into his features with every word that was said aloud.

 

“And yesterday my best friend forced me down on my knees, disregarding my entire being and… and…” Koushi felt his throat gone dry. Daichi took a step towards him but Koushi automatically went backwards.  

 

“Daichi, I am scared of you. I am frightened of being near to you.” He looked at him with accusing eyes. It was now Daichi’s turn to look away. He was ashamed of what he had done to Suga.

 

“You are still my friend but I would like you to keep your distance for a while. I need some time to get over it. Do you understand that?” Daichi nodded reassuringly, lifting a little bit of the pressure Koushi felt on his chest.

 

“I’ll be going ahead then. See you in class.” Suga could feel his legs shaking but nevertheless went on with his head held up high.

 

The 3rd years had to hand in their career path they would like to aim for today and Suga had  decided that he wanted to do something with his life which improved the situation of omegas. Studying social services and politics would be a good option to improve the understanding between the second genders, he thought. He still wasn’t able to get used to his second gender but spending his time with the other omegas on the team helped him to accept this part of himself slowly. Especially spending time with Hinata improved his lately sour mood noticeable. The fiery redhead gave him strength and hope that being an omega wasn’t all about hurting and suffering.

 

One day when they were running along the block during their volleyball practice, Hinata’s overzealousness knew again no boundaries and he swung off the given path. Suga was following him to get him on the right track again when he saw him coming to a halt at a pedestrian bridge.

 

“Suga-senpai look! The sunset is amazing!” There was nothing special about it but Hinata’s eyes were glowing with excitement. He was full of life, and Suga was sure that there was nothing that would stop him from becoming one day the little giant. He didn’t know why but he hugged Hinata from behind. The boy was perfectly fitting between his arms and Koushi could swear that his heart beat faster when he felt Hinata hugging him back.

 

“Hey Hinata,” he started to sound as casual as he could, trying to hide his nervousness “what would you say if I would ask you to go out with me?”

 

“Eh? You want to be my boyfriend?” He was grinning. “That can’t be right? We are both omegas.” Suga’s heart sunk at the easily spoken words from his kouhai. Good thing Hinata couldn’t see his face.

 

“Right. Silly me, I’m still not used thinking of myself as an omega, I guess.”  

 

“I am sure you will find someday your pair Suga-senpai. We both will.”

 

“Come on, the others are probably waiting for us.”

 

 

 

It still wasn’t easy for Koushi being close to alphas since his encounter with Daichi but he tried not to meet them with hatred but understanding. He hadn’t talked with Daichi much since then and everyone noticed the change in their relationship but they refused to talk with anyone about what had happened.

 

Right now they were worrying more if their secret weapon, the chaos duo, was even allowed to participate in the upcoming tournament due to their grades. They had committed Yachi and Tsukishima to learn with them but the latter mentioned wouldn’t dream of wasting his precious time on two “pathetic morons incapable of learning” and Yachi was right now ill in bed with a cold.

 

Since the second years were also busy with their preparations for their own exams, Suga agreed to hold study sessions for the week for the two.

 

“Kageyama are you even listening?”  He had decided to teach them separately since they just distracted each other too much. He didn’t even want to remember the milk incident two days ago.

 

“Uhm, I…no.” Suga let out a sigh.

 

“I talked like fifteen minutes about how not to mix up all the English tenses. Where was your mind wandering off the whole time? Must have been really interesting.” He still felt uncomfortable in the presence of an alpha but Kageyama had earned his trust when it came to self-control.

 

His kouhai was making all kind of faces thinking about a satisfying answer he could give his senpai but his brain wasn’t just able to think of something smart to retort. Well, Koushi couldn’t deny the fact that this was amusing to watch.

 

“Maybe we should call it a day and…” He was about to pack his things together when Kageyama was frantically holding down the textbook Suga was about to close.

 

“No, no, no! Don’t go, I’ll do better, I promise! I can do it!” Suga couldn’t suppress a smile. One wouldn’t assume that the stoic Kageyama had this childish moments. He was reaching out ruffling Kageyama’s hair unconsciously.

 

“My, my, ain’t you an eager one? Okay, one more time.” Suga said getting a look at his notes.

 

“I still can’t believe you are teaching me.” His kouhai said his voice almost a whisper.

 

“Huh? Why shouldn’t I teach you?”

 

“Eh, I mean, I can feel your disdain and reluctance against alphas but despite that you are still trying patiently to help someone stupid like me.” Suga was flustered; he had underestimated the emphatic abilities of the younger one. Kageyama was always good for a surprise.

 

“You aren’t stupid Kageyama. You just need a little more time than others. That is nothing to be ashamed of. I also need a lot of time to get things into my head. Makes me the same as you I guess.” It didn’t seem like Kageyama had heard him at all. His gaze was unfocused and he seemed to have trouble to breath. Concerned Suga reached out for him.

 

“Kageyama? Hey, are you okay?” He wasn’t, Suga could tell and without further warning Kageyama lost his consciousness in Suga’s arms. Shouting for help, Kageyama’s mother came running into the room, calling an ambulance immediately seeing the state of her son, who was now shaking violently.

 

Later that day, when Suga tried to call Kageyama to ask about his condition, his mother answered the phone with a shrill voice.

 

“It is all your fault! Stay away from my son!”


End file.
